Evanescenced Into Insanity
by TheCrazyClarinetist
Summary: Band parodies of all of the Evanescence: Fallen songs! Now up: My Last Reed ((My Last Breath))
1. Going Crazy

Evanescenced Into Insanity

My friends and I LOVE the Evanescence CD "Fallen" ((BUY IT!!  BUY IT!  BUY IT!!!)), Band and writing parodies….  One can only guess what we made up…  We made parodies of every song on the CD!  Here they are for your enjoyment….  They will be posted in the order that the original songs are on the CD.

The original songs are the incredible musical genius of Evanescence, and I hope we can be forgiven for slaughtering their songs.

This one is written from the point of view of our head Band director…  heh….

Going Crazy

Parody of Evanescence's "Going Under"

By Rissa and Amanda on the bus ride to our last competition

Now I will tell you what I've done for you

Fifty thousand times I've tried

To get you to hit your "dern" sets on the mark

But you still won't hit them

I'm going crazy

Don't want your "reasons" for missing practice

Just shut up and come on time

You torment me daily when your sets you lose

Just when I thought you'd got it down

I'm drunk again

I'm going crazy (going crazy)

All day long (all day long)

You don't hit your sets right (hit your sets right)

You get them all wrong

I'm going crazy

Blurring and stirring the lines and the form

So I don't know who's there and who's not

Always confusing the form and my hands

So I can't trust the band anymore

I'm high again

I'm going crazy (going crazy)

All day long (all day long)

You don't hit your sets right (hit your sets right)

You get them all wrong

I'm going crazy

So go on and leave

Leave this band

I don't give a "dern"

I want you all to know

I'm gonna leave I can't keep going crazy

You're lost again

I'm going crazy (going crazy)

All day long (all day long)

You don't hit your sets right (hit your sets right)

You get them all wrong

I'm going crazy (Going crazy)

I'm going crazy (All day long)

I'm going crazy

Read and review!  Next on the EVANESCENCED INTO INSANITY CD: "Bring Him a Knife"


	2. Bring Him a Knife

Unless otherwise noted, all of these parodies are written from the point of view of a student!  Hehehe.

Bring Him a Knife

Parody of Evanescence's "Bring Me to Life"

By Amanda in the shower  ((TMI….  O.o() ))

How can you judge us by the way rehearsal goes

Listen to the way that we waste time 

On sets we all should know

We cannot play

Our instruments are getting cold

When we finally play we'll be out of tune

(March in step) Help us stay in time

(I can't mark time) Help us stay in time

(Save us) If we don't then we'll feel Peeerce's wrath

(March in step) Teach us to jazz run

(I can't mark time) Get division one

(Save us) Save us from the joke that we've become

Now that we know all of our sets

We have to hit them

If we don't G will throw a fit

Bring him a knife

(March in step) Help us stay in time

(I can't mark time) Help us stay in time

(Save us) If we don't then we'll feel Peeerce's wrath

(March in step) Teach us to jazz run

(I can't mark time) Get division one

(Save us) Save us from the joke that we've become

Bring him a knife

((He's been tryin' to lie

He's angry inside))

Bring him a knife

Waiting outside without a beat

Without a metronome

Only he can tell us all to stand in check

All of this time I can't believe we couldn't see

Marching in step but we can't hear the melody

He's been trying a thousand drills it seems

Got to let out his wrath on everything

Without a beat without a band without a show

Don't let us die here

There has to be a show

Bring him a knife

(March in step) Help us stay in time

(I can't mark time) Help us stay in time

(Save us) If we don't then we'll feel Peeerce's wrath

(March in step) Teach us to jazz run

(I can't mark time) Get division one

(Save us) Save us from the joke that we've become

Bring him a knife

((He's been tryin' to lie

He's angry inside))

Bring him a knife

Next on the EVANESCENCED INTO INSANITY CD: Everybody Fooled


	3. Everybody Fooled

Everybody Fooled

Parody of Evanescence's "Everybody's Fool"

By Amanda

Ordered by tryouts

Sure signs of overblown notes

Just what this band needs

More dreams about a show that

Never was and never will be

Woodwind parts are pure irony

Brasses have got everybody fooled

Crap here it comes now

Trumpets play loud on long notes

How Mr. G screams*

He just hears the ostenato**

But now we know what

Never was and never will be

Long Brass chords aren't the melody

Somehow we've got everybody fooled

At BOA how will we play

Can't hear woodwind parts anyway

G knows the truth now

He knows who we is

And he don't want us anymore

It never was and never will be

Long Brass chords aren't the melody

Somehow we've got everybody fooled

It never was and never will be

Woodwinds can play out finally

Somehow we had everybody fooled

*Mr. G is the head Band director…  and I kinda tweaked his name a bit ^.^

**For those of you that may not know, the ostenato ((which I don't know if I spelled right….)) is the phrase that keeps repeating itself in a piece of music….  Our first movement was full of ostenatos, and at first the entrances of the new parts weren't loud enough, so he'd get mad because he kept hearing the same stuff over and over again…  I hope I made sense….  0.o

Next on the EVANESCENCED INTO INSANITY CD: My Worst Fear Reincarnated in the Form of a Stick-ishly Skinny Band director With No Life, No Personality Whatsoever and Annoyingly Slicked Back Hair... Did We Mention He Does This Really Annoying Pitch Singing Thing When We Tune?'

(("My Spot" for short))


	4. My Spot

My Worst Fear Reincarnated in the Form of a Stick-ishly Skinny Band director With No Life, No Personality Whatsoever and Annoyingly Slicked Back Hair... Did We Mention He Does This Really Annoying Pitch Singing Thing When We Tune?'

(("My Spot" for short))

Parody of Evanescence's "My Immortal"

By Amanda and Rissa on the same bus ride to the last competition as Going Crazy… heh…  And once again, thanks to Rissa for the title!

I'm so tired of being here

Forced to run for correcting my peers

I was never told we had silent rehearsal

And the thought still lingers here

That he won't leave me alone

He yells at me all day long

He always says I'm wrong

It seems like he's always on my case

When he screams I want to burst into tears

He's now the source of my greatest fears

I'm stuck in band for three more years

Maybe he'll just take

My spot from me

They used to captivate me

By their oh so straight lines

Now I'm stuck in one that bends and twists and winds

Medusa haunts my once pleasant dreams*

Peeeerce's voice chased away all of the sanity in me**

He yells at me all day long

He always says I'm wrong

It seems like he's always on my case

When he screams I want to burst into tears

He's now the source of my greatest fears

I'm stuck in band for three more years

Maybe he'll just take

My spot from me

I've tried so hard to tell the band that I'm wrong

But though I'm still marching

I've been off beat all day long

When he screams I want to burst into tears

He's now the source of my greatest fears

I'm stuck in band for three more years

Maybe he'll just take

My spot from me

Spot from me

Spot from me

Spot from me

*Medusa was our field show!   Yay!

**creative spelling to hide his name

For the record…. I don't think he's that bad.  He's actually pretty nice to me…. But then again, I don't have him as my actual Band teacher ((mine is Mr. G, whom everybody ALSO says is bad but I actually like)), so I don't know of any wrongs that he wills upon his students.  =D  Sorry, Rissa.

Next on the EVANESCENCED INTO INSANITY CD: Troubled


	5. Troubled

Troubled

Parody of Evanescence's "Hautned"

By Amanda on a midnight spree… literally…

For reference… you love a family member and lerf a friend.  You'll see what I mean later….

Long hours outside made me insane

Don't know why I haven't quit

And all this year Peeerce has been screaming at me,

"Get into the box!"

Watching me wanting me

To get my sets for Friday down

Fearing them lerfing them

I will never make them proud

Learning sets I can feel the heat rise

Their screams echo in my head

Watching me wanting me

To learn how to march the show

Passing me flunking me

Watching me

(Watching me wanting me)

To get my sets for Friday down

(Fearing them lerfing them)

I will never make them proud

Next on the EVANESCENCED INTO INSANITY CD: Gatorade


	6. Gatorade

Gatorade

Parody of Evanescence's "Tourniquet"

By Amanda and Mark during English class when Mrs. A was telling us about how "Quotes are like people!  They get lonely!  You need to take them out…  let them meet new people!  They need to make friends!" or something like that ((and the last two lines of the first verse by Rissa-chan!))

I tried to break my horn

But did not succeed (I couldn't)

I hate this band and if I don't quit 

I'm going to hurt myself

I'm marching; feet dying; they're bleeding; he's screaming

"Get your horn into the box!

Into the box!"

I need my Gatorade

Or I'll die of a heat stroke

I need my Gatorade

Or I'll die of a heat stroke

I can't remember sets

I'm always off

At UIL I forgot when we had to step off

I'm marching; feet dying; they're bleeding; I'm screaming

"Is it too late to drop out?

Is it too late?"

I need my Gatorade

Or I'll die of a heat stroke

I need my Gatorade 

Or I'll die of a heat stroke

((I'm gonna diiiie!))

I need my Gatorade

Or I'll die of a heat stroke

I need my Gatorade 

Or I'll die of a heat stroke

My feet cry for rest

My horn cries for destruction

Will I be denied rest

Gatorade

Or will I die

This is the first time that Mark has had anything to do with my account…  he's one of my friends that I sit next to in English class, and we write a lot of stuff when we get bored… he had this one story about Mr. BunBuns…  **blink** Never mind.  Oh yeah, he's in Rissa's band and plays percussion ((pit during marching season))

Next on the EVANESCENCED INTO INSANITY CD: Six Hours


	7. Six Hours

Six Hours

Parody of Evanescence's "Imaginary"

By Amanda on December 11, 2003

((La la la la region tryouts

La la la la region tryouts))

I linger in the doorway

With the freshmen screaming

Monitors calling my name

Must I stay

Where the seniors snigger at me

Where the juniors as they're playing miss the pitches

In the room at region tryouts

With upperclassmen that can't play

I sit in boredom for six hours

And watch my social life go down the drain

Don't say I'm out of tune

With this wooden Buffet and my ghetto reed

I know well how concert D should sound in the song

It's not my fault that my pitch is always off

In the room at region tryouts

With upperclassmen that can't play

I sit in boredom for six hours

And watch my social life go down the drain

Preoccupied by the sound of my tuning

Cannot stop for a fear of lower scores

Oh how I long to be first chair region

The lost dream after my turn in round one

In the room at region tryouts

With upperclassmen that can't play

I sit in boredom for six hours

And watch my social life go down the drain

((La la la la region tryouts

La la la la region tryouts))

Heh. High school region… much fun… **BLINK** Yeah, well… Honestly? Phase one ((elimination round)) took six hours… and they had even split Clarinets into three rooms! Sigh. I made it to phase two, and that one room took at least five hours… and I get to go for three more years! Yay!

NEXT ON THE EVANESCENCED INTO INSANITY CD: Quit Anyway


	8. Quit Anyway

"Taking Over Me" is probably one of my favorite songs on the album... this parody, however, is not.  Sorry 'bout that....

Quit Anyway

Parody of Evanescence's "Taking Over Me"

By Amanda and Rissa ((She saves me in tight spots when I can't think of verses or lines!  **waves flag with R on it**  Yay for Rissa!!))

 You don't remember notes

Or how they all should sound

I lie awake at night in fear that I'll hear your song

'Cause I can't decide what you play

And play you do….

I can't believe you

I have tried everything just to teach you

The two page contest piece

Why do you play

You should quit anyway

Well, you've forgotten all I taught

And how to play

You saw me hitting my head on the wall

I heard you say,

"I wish that I could quit!!"

I can't believe you

I have tried everything just to teach you

The two page contest piece

Why do you play

You should quit anyway

You played for the mirror and it cracked

It would make most kids stop

But still you play and turn the music into a bunch of crap

I can't believe you

I have tried everything just to teach you

The two page contest piece

Why do you play

You should quit anyway

I can't believe you

I have tried everything just to teach you

The two piece contest piece

Why do you play

You should quit anyway

Should quit anyway

You should quit anyway

Should quit anyway

Should quit anyway

Next on the EVANESCENCED INTO INSANITY CD: Haa-ayy!!


	9. Hellurr

If ever there was a slaughtered Evanescence song... this is it.  I think I killed it so badly that it's not even funny.  Sorry 'bout that....

Let me tell you about the word "hellurr."  If that's even how it's spelled.  My very good friend Deanna and I have a type of joke...  instead of "hello," I said "haa-ayy!" to her and she replies with, "hellurr."  I'm telling you right now... I did not make up this word.  Deanna and her brother ((my friend and section leader .)) saw some play and one of the characters says "hellurr" instead of "hi" or something normal.  So...  Deanna, hope you don't mind me using your word ((I put in a disclaimer .)), and I'm sorry that I completely killed this beautiful song.  Forgive me.

Hellurr

Parody of Evanescence's "Hello"

By Amanda on January 6, 2004

Death squawk strikes the band again

Song gets screwed over again

Has no one told you he's not teaching?

Hellurr we're his band

Giving him a reason to hide

Hellurr

If I still don't understand

Then I shouldn't be in this band

Don't try to teach me

I won't listen

Hellurr I'm a fish

Giving you a reason to quit

Oh crap

Suddenly I know he won't come back

Hellurr I'm still here

You couldn't drive me away

NEXT ON THE EVANESCENCED INTO INSANITY CD: My Last Reed


	10. My Last Reed

My Last Reed

Parody of Evanescence's "My Last Breath"

By RISSA and Amanda  ((Rissa wrote almost all of this.  I simply added a few lines!  Heh.  .  This is her favorite song on the CD, so she came up with this stuff REALLY fast.  GO RISSA!  confetti))

Hold on a minute now

I know that note's not right

How can it be out of tune

When it came out fine last night ((ohhh))

I know I screwed up

I can see it in his face

Playing my last reed

Hitting all wrong notes

Death Squawk every time

Music's been wronged

My reed killed the song

I'll miss the rhythm

The sound of harmony

But I'm broke and this ghetto reed is all that I have ((need a new one))  
I know it's bad

But it's the only one I have

Playing my last reed

Hitting all wrong notes

Death Squawk every time

Music's been wronged

My reed killed the song

Hands over your ears hope they won't bleed

You pray the sound won't make you scream

But still it does you know the truth

The Death Squawk lives

Make it stop  
It's all so bad

Telling me telling me that I've been cut out

Make it stop (Playing my last reed)

It's all so bad (Hitting all wrong notes)

Telling me telling me (Death Squawk every time)

Music's been wronged

My reed killed the song

Playing my last reed

Hitting all wrong notes

Death Squawk every time

Music's been wronged

My reed killed the song

Playing my last reed

Next on the EVANESCENCED INTO INSANITY: Fallen


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